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If you’d rather stay in bed and do nothing, feel free to do just that! Engaging in an alternative activity simply gives you the opportunity to do something more pleasant if staying in bed and doing nothing feels unpleasant. If nighttime wakefulness feels comfortable, there’s no need to do anything!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum — you definitely aren’t alone in the struggle you described!
First, it might be helpful to know that waking during the night is a normal part of sleep. If falling back to sleep seems to be difficult, it might be because you are (understandably!) getting involved in the process and trying to make sleep happen.
If you feel comfortable when awake in bed, you might want to stay in bed for as long as that feels comfortable. If it starts to feel uncomfortable, if you find yourself getting tangled up in a struggle with the wakefulness or any of the thoughts and feelings that might be showing up, you might want to give yourself the opportunity to practice experiencing wakefulness with less of a struggle.
That might involve engaging in an alternative activity (for example, reading) and if you would rather to that alternative activity in bed, feel free to do just that! If conditions start to feel right for sleep to happen, you can stop the activity and repeat the process of allowing wakefulness to exist for as long as it feels comfortable and doing something else if you find yourself struggling again.
I am not sure if you are checking the time during the night — if you are, moving away from that might be helpful, too.
If you’re not finding any of the sleep hygiene rules and rituals helpful (people with chronic insomnia don’t usually find them helpful) then you might want to move away from them — I suspect you know plenty of people who consume caffeine, use screens before bed or even in bed (gasp!), have a warm bedroom with light cracking through the curtains and still sleep well, right?
I hope there’s something useful here.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I know we have communicated via email, but I also wanted to respond here for others who might read your post and identify with the issue you shared.
First, I think it can be helpful to refocus a bit to see if we can identify why this seems to be a problem.
You might ask yourself what you’d be doing differently with your life if your sleep was the same on Sundays as it was every other night of the week.
What are you currently unable to do that you would be able to do if you could sleep well on Sundays?
If you’d be doing things differently, it can be helpful to explore ways of moving toward those actions, independently of how sleep goes on Sunday nights.
If you wouldn’t be doing things differently, but you recognize that you’d be feeling differently, it might be worth exploring how workable the approach of trying to control thoughts and feelings might be.
I am yet to come across a human being who is able to permanently control their thoughts and feelings — regardless of the effort involved, the thoughts and feelings that we try to fight or avoid always end up coming back.
Sometimes, it’s all the effort we exert as we try to fight or avoid difficult or uncomfortable thoughts and feelings that makes them even more difficult (and makes it harder for us to live the kind of life we want to live).
Similarly, when it comes to sleep, the more effort we put into it or the more pressure we put on ourselves to make sleep happen, the more difficult it becomes.
Ultimately, for as long as our intent is to control sleep, our thoughts, or our feelings, we are more likely to get tangled up in an endless struggle — and that might be what’s happening on Sunday nights.
A more workable goal might be to move away from the (understandable but futile) control agenda. To move away from the struggle.
In turn, this might also free up energy and attention to do more of what matters and, as a bonus, also create better conditions for sleep to occur.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It’s definitely really difficult when we go without sleep for multiple nights in a row. No doubt about it. How have things been since you posted?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It’s quite remarkable how functional we can be after nights of little sleep, isn’t it?
The good news is there’s no evidence chronic insomnia causes any health problem or any health condition — probably because the body will always generate, at the very least, the minimum amount of sleep it needs.
What can make things more difficult is effort — the more we try to make sleep happen, the more we try to get rid of wakefulness, the more we try to fight or avoid the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with insomnia, the more difficult it all becomes.
I hope there’s something useful here.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Shalom and welcome to the forum — you are not alone! If you have any questions please feel free to post them here.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I just wanted to chime in here to validate that worry about insomnia returning if you have another child. Yes, it might. And, it might not. That’s out of your control since sleep cannot be controlled 🙂
We can only control our actions and it’s our actions that determine whether we move toward the life we want to live or away from the life we want to live.
So, we are faced with a choice here. We can live a life trying to avoid difficult stuff (such as nighttime wakefulness, anxiety, worry, stress, fear, etc) — and this will likely involve us doing less of the things that matter to us and moving away from the life we want to live. And, the difficult stuff we’re trying to avoid will probably still show up from time to time anyway since it comes with being a human being.
Or, we can do things that matter, even if difficult stuff might show up and even in the presence of difficult stuff. This way, we are living the life we want to live and any difficult stuff that shows up is at least serving some kind of purpose!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum, Sophie — and congratulations on the little one!
It’s not too surprising that you haven’t found medication or sleep hygiene to be helpful long-term solutions since neither really tackle the problem of insomnia — the struggle we engage in to get rid of wakefulness (and the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come along for the ride) that often end up supplying insomnia with the oxygen it needs to survive.
Did you give my free insomnia sleep training course a try? How did you get on with it? Did you pick up any helpful or useful insights?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum, Mahi. It makes complete sense that you’re feeling anxious about your mom’s health — it might be more concerning if you didn’t experience any worry or anxiety in that situation!
Sometimes difficult thoughts and feelings remind us of things that are important to us — they contain important messages. With this in mind, they don’t necessarily need to be fought. We don’t necessarily need to fight or avoid what our mind is doing — and, sometimes, it’s the fight that makes things more difficult.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome! Plenty of (hopefully relatable!) stories can be found in the Insomnia Coach podcast — and, of course, we’d love to hear your story whenever you feel ready to share it!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Difficult thoughts and feelings all come from a good place — your mind doing its job of looking out for you! By themselves, they don’t guarantee that sleep won’t happen — but trying to fight or avoid your thoughts and feelings sure can make sleep (and living the life you want to live) a lot more difficult!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I think one way we can let go is to move away from trying to fight or avoid all the difficult stuff that we cannot control — for example, nighttime wakefulness, our thoughts, our feelings.
Since we can’t control these things, the more we try to fight or avoid them, the more we struggle — and the struggle usually makes everything more difficult as all that stuff pushes back, consumes our energy, and distracts us from doing things that matter and from the world around us.
An alternative might involve acknowledging all this difficult stuff and allowing it to exist and to come and go as it chooses (even though you might wish it wasn’t present, there it is) — and continuing to engage in activities (no matter how small) that keep you moving toward the life you want to live, even in the presence of this difficult stuff.
You might also find it helpful to be a bit kinder to yourself. What you’re going through is hard — if your best friend or a loved family member was going through what you’re going through, what would you say to them? How would you treat them? Please consider talking to yourself and treating yourself with a similar level of kindness, too.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum! If you have any questions or wish to share any concerns (or insights!) please feel free to post them here!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing! It sounds as though you’ve discovered that you are capable of generating sleep without any kind of medication — an insight that will likely be helpful for some time to come!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
The world record for continuous wakefulness is 11 days — but that took someone immense effort and was extremely difficult to achieve. Most of us aren’t trying to stay awake so sleep usually happens a lot sooner than that!
Sleep always happens in the end, no matter what. You might find this video helpful: Even if you have chronic insomnia, sleep drive always wins — you can sleep and you will sleep!
Finally, not a single study has found that chronic insomnia increases the risk of death or causes any health problem.
I hope this helps.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
