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I suspect you will find sleep restriction helpful since the rollercoaster nights you described are a common symptom associated with allotting too much time for sleep at night!
You said that you wouldn’t be able to perform your job if you had gone in after a night of insomnia — can you tell us a bit more about that? What is your job? Do you truly believe that you would have been 100% incompetent because of your insomnia and been 100% unable to perform any part of your usual job duties?
Did staying at home after calling in sick lead to a better day or did it perhaps lead to more sleep-related worry and maybe a bit more fatigue due to less activity and fewer distractions?
You might find these videos helpful, too:
Rearranging your life around sleep only feeds your insomnia and makes the problem worse
The difference between chronic insomnia and sleep deprivation (and why it matters)
I hope this helps!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It definitely sounds as though arousal seems to be making it harder for sleep to occur when you are in bed. So, let’s see if we can do anything to help tackle that!
First, I’d suggest not checking the time during the night since that increases arousal and makes falling back to sleep more difficult — if you are logging total sleep time, then it’s usually far more helpful just to use your best estimate.
If you are lying awake for hours in bed during the night, you might be reinforcing some conditioned arousal — training your mind over and over again that the bed is an unpleasant place to be. I’d suggest getting out of bed whenever being in bed doesn’t feel good and doing something to make nighttime wakefulness a bit more pleasant until conditions feel better for sleep (or, at the very least sitting up in bed and doing something more pleasant than tossing and turning).
Finally, what are the obvious negative consequences associated with not getting more than five hours of sleep? Are they 100% caused by how much sleep you get, 100% of the time? Might there be any other factors that influence the quality of your day other than the number of hours of sleep you get?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I have a feeling the reason why it’s hard to remember what you did when you were a good sleeper is precisely because you didn’t do anything — sleep was something you didn’t really think about or pay much attention to! Do you think this might be an accurate suggestion?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Some big insights in this discussion! It sounds as though you know from experience that studying for an exam is far more important and a much bigger predictor of how you will do in an exam than how well or how poorly you sleep.
In other words, you know that sleep doesn’t matter all that much — so perhaps there’s no need to worry about it or care too much about it! Shift all that focus and attention to studying and get back to us when you get all those great results!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You certainly haven’t forgotten how to fall asleep, Aprilwill66! It simply sounds as though you need to create slightly better conditions for sleep to occur. If you are finding it hard to fall asleep, you might be going to bed before you are sufficiently sleepy for sleep — implementing a sleep window can be really helpful for that.
In terms of what to think about when you get into bed, you might find this video helpful: What to think about when you get into bed to help you relax and make sleep happen.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You definitely CAN sleep, Gemini! Thanks for sharing!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
As you have experienced for yourself, melatonin doesn’t generate sleep — so I think that’s one sleep effort you can safely abandon!
You mention that you’ve been going to bed at 10:30 PM and get out of bed around 6:00 AM to 6:30 AM. This means you are allotting between seven-and-a-half and eight hours for sleep each night while averaging around four or five hours of sleep.
Do you think that allotting an amount of time for sleep that is a bit closer to the amount of time you usually spend asleep at night might help reduce nighttime wakefulness?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
What evidence do you have to support the idea that a sleepless night leads to more sleepless nights?
It sounds as though you have come up with a number of more accurate ways of thinking that probably generate less anxiety, too — for example:
* Sleep becomes more likely after difficult nights
* If I don’t fall asleep, I can still enjoy some restful time in bed
* I cannot control sleep, but I can create better conditions for sleepI think you are close to uncovering the thought that is truly generating anxiety. What is it about wakefulness that generates anxiety? If you are keen to explore this further you might ask yourself what would happen if one night did lead to a string of sleepless nights. If that happened, then what (and how likely is that to happen)?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You are not alone, Rich!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
First of all, let me reassure you that all the sleep you are getting — even when taking medication — is sleep that you are generating all by yourself.
The ironic thing about sleeping pills is they never have a positive outcome on our sleep — if we take a pill and sleep, we believe the pill generated sleep and this erodes confidence in our natural ability to sleep. If we take a pill and don’t sleep, we believe something is wrong with our sleep and this increases arousal!
In terms of stimulus control, you might want to try simply returning to bed whenever you feel sleepy enough for sleep again — no need to force yourself to remain out of bed for 30 minutes! Similarly, you might want to try simply allowing yourself to remain in bed when you are awake during your sleep window for as long as being in bed feels good — because that means conditions are right for sleep!
I hope this helps.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
The fact you recognize your mind is catastrophizing is very encouraging! As you pointed out, you have never experienced psychosis because of poor sleep and there is no evidence that chronic insomnia causes mental health problems. When we are awake for long enough, we will always sleep! If we create better conditions for sleep by building sleep drive, strengthening the body clock, and lowering arousal, we make sleep a lot easier!
It’s completely normal and expected for sleep to be disrupted at times of change — the less we react to that sleep disruption, the easier it is for our sleep to get right back on track all by itself. If it doesn’t, that’s almost always because of a change in our sleep-related thoughts and behaviors. If that happens, we can simply explore and modify our thinking and behaviors to — once again — create better conditions for sleep!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I wonder if the guided sleep meditation might be a covert sleep effort? Sleep efforts increase arousal and can make sleep more difficult since the mind remains active to monitor for the effectiveness of the effort.
If you are keen to explore this further, you might ask yourself why you feel the need to put effort into sleep? If you didn’t put effort into sleep, what would happen? What is the underlying concern associated with sleep/wakefulness that seems to generate anxiety?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
The start and end time matter far less than the duration of the sleep window and how consistent you are with implementation — so, I’d suggest choosing a start time and end time that you feel you’d be able to implement most consistently!
I hope this helps!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It definitely sounds as though heightened arousal might be contributing to your sleep difficulties — and that’s not unusual since arousal is one of the three factors that perpetuate sleep disruption (the other two being low sleep drive and body clock disruption).
Have you asked your doctor about cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I)? CBT-I techniques are a really helpful way to tackle the thoughts and behaviors that perpetuate sleep disruption and give insomnia the oxygen it needs to survive. Remove the oxygen, and you starve the insomnia.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
As Chee suggested, ups and downs are completely normal — did anything, in particular, happen this past week that caused the sleep disruption you described? Usually, the best reaction to temporary periods of sleep disruption is no reaction — stick to the plan and continue to do what has proved to be helpful prior to that temporary period of sleep disruption and you’ll give your sleep the best chance possible to get right back on track all by itself!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
