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It sounds as though the more you try to make sleep happen, the more difficult it seems to become — would you say that’s accurate?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I am yet to meet someone who knows how to switch their mind off, so it makes sense that you have found yourself unable to do that!
Since your experience tells you that you cannot turn your mind off, do you feel there’s a chance that all your understandable attempts to turn your mind off might be making things more difficult? If so, what might an alternative approach look like?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds as though you are learning a lot from your experience!
You will always care about things that are important to you. If sleep is important to you, you are going to care about it — trying to pretend otherwise might not be helpful, and trying to fight that feeling might set you up for a struggle.
You know from experience that fighting wakefulness, fighting your thoughts, fighting your feelings is a strategy that can make things more difficult and that makes sense since sleep is probably going to be more difficult if you are at war with your mind during the night.
So, perhaps what might be tripping you up here is your belief that you need to “not care” — that you need to eliminate certain thoughts and feelings. An alternative strategy might be more aligned with how you started your post — moving away from the struggle that comes from trying to control what your experience tells you cannot be controlled. Moving away from trying to fight or avoid wakefulness, certain thoughts, certain feelings.
It’s OK to want a certain amount or type of sleep. That’s understandable! What matters is how you act in response to that desire. Do your actions help you drop the battle or do your actions make things more difficult? Do your actions reflect who you are and who you want to be and move you closer to the life you want to live? Or, do they pull you away from the life you want to live?
As for courage, it’s easy for us to believe that the absence of difficult thoughts and feelings is needed in order for us to act how we want to act. However, courage comes from acting even in the presence of difficult thoughts and feelings.
Is there anything useful here?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum, Paciencia — it’s good to have you here
Tinnitus on top of insomnia definitely makes things more difficult and it is not a barrier to progress. You might find my podcast with Juergen helpful since he spoke about his experience with tinnitus, too: How Juergen improved his sleep by becoming more willing to experience wakefulness and difficult thoughts, feelings, and emotions.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Dinky (and Romans!) and welcome to the forum!
What you are experiencing isn’t unique or unusual. Waking during the night is a normal part of sleep and sleep cycles aren’t always 90 minutes in duration
As you mentioned, not all stressors can be controlled or eliminated and fortunately we can still control our actions in the presence of stressors — and our actions often determine whether we add more struggle and difficulty on top of this difficult stuff.
When you wake during the night, how do you currently respond in that moment?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Sorry to hear about your 12-year long struggle with insomnia, Kaku. Is the sleep medication working for you? When your mind starts to race at night, how do you respond?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Dan! It sounds as though you have taken a lot from the course and you have a keen awareness of how your actions can influence your level of struggle.
Waking during the night is a normal part of sleep. If your body needs to generate more sleep, it’ll generate more sleep all by itself (no intervention is required). What typically makes falling back to sleep more difficult are our attempts to fall back to sleep — the more we try, the more we can struggle.
It sounds as though you are on the right track here; you are not fighting your thoughts and feelings. You are acknowledging them and allowing them to come and go as they choose.
Just as thoughts can come and go, the feeling of sleepiness can come and go, too. Trying to find or keep hold of sleepiness is an attempt to control how you feel — something that can create a struggle (and almost certainly send sleepiness into hiding)!
When you sit up in bed and read a book, what is your goal? What are you trying to achieve when you do that?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
That’s a great question and I’d be happy to share my thoughts — but first, I’d like to hear from you! How do you think you can stop using weed for sleep (and why is that important to you)?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Sleep studies aren’t usually helpful for chronic insomnia but they can help rule out the presence of other sleep issues (such as sleep apnea).
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Ups and downs are natural and normal and the brain fog and fatigue is difficult. How are you currently responding to those challenges?
The only way you can fail is if you continue engaging in actions that you know won’t get you closer to where you want to be — and, even then, I would argue that’s not a failure but a learning experience.
You have learned that it’s important to you not to take melatonin or Xanax. With that in mind, how might you respond in a different way next time you wake during the night?
When you experience anxiety and thoughts like, “Will I sleep tonight?” (all of which are natural and normal) how do you respond and how is that response working for you?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds as though you are reclaiming your life from insomnia, thanks to your own commitment to ongoing, meaningful action! I hope you give yourself plenty of credit for that because it’s not easy to do!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
There are no definite answers to those questions, Chrissie! They are all valid and understandable questions and they come from your problem-solving mind doing its job of looking out for you.
You get to decide how to respond to those thoughts — you could take time out of your day (and your life) to research possible answers and you could return to your old ways of dealing with this (only you know how helpful or effective that would be).
Or, you could acknowledge them, thank your brain for looking out for you, and continue with your day (and your life), and continue working on the new approach that you are exploring in this course.
Remember that your experience tells you sleep cannot be directly or permanently controlled. However, you can always control your actions — and it’s your actions that determine how much power and influence sleep, your thoughts, and your feelings, have over your life.
Progress is a journey of ups and downs and it is never linear — you are practicing new skills here. And, just like when we learn any other new skill there will be times when it feels we are making progress and times when it feels we aren’t. What matters is continuing to practice!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thank you for sharing, Chrissie!
I love how you’ve connected the three good things exercise with your own experience as a rookie journalist — curious observation can be so powerful!
The sleep window can be challenging — especially at first! Is your difficulty related to your desire to go to bed in an effort to make sleep happen or is it because you are falling asleep and finding it really hard to stay awake before the sleep window begins?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I would suggest adding half-hour or so to your average nightly sleep duration — that would give you a sleep window of 6.5 hours. And, I think that if you are finding it really hard to stay awake it’s OK to go to bed up to an hour before your sleep window begins.
It might even be helpful to make the hour before your sleep window begins the last time you check the time until the end of your sleep window and allow yourself to go to bed when you feel sleepy enough for sleep.
Does this help?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
This might be a better question for a personal trainer or physical therapist — what I would throw into the conversation here is that perhaps as you work through the course and build skill in experiencing wakefulness and difficult thoughts and feelings with less struggle you might also find that tension eases up a bit, too.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
