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Sorry to hear that, Sheena — have you fully recovered from COVID now? How have you been getting on with the sleep window since you posted?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Glad to hear things have been better since you worked through the course in 2020!
Sleep is more likely to be irregular if our sleep schedule is irregular — so a consistent out of bed time might help if you feel it’s important to create conditions for more consistent sleep.
With that being said, a sleep schedule isn’t intended to create a certain amount or type of sleep — it’s more helpful as a tool that can help us move away from chasing after sleep; something that can often make things more difficult.
In terms of making your sleep pattern regular, does your experience tell you that you can make a certain amount or type of sleep happen through effort? If not, how is trying to make that happen helping you?
Some other things that might be helpful to consider:
Have you ever got eight hours of sleep and found that you didn’t function perfectly — or does eight hours of sleep always guarantee a day of perfect workplace function, 100% of the time?
What if you get 7 hours and 58 minutes of sleep? Does that mean you are then guaranteed a day of less than perfection?
How is your pursuit of functioning perfectly at work working for you?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Guilt and shame can be really difficult feelings to deal with and often show up when we are being hard on ourselves. Are you continuing to struggle with those feelings? If so, how might you practice being a bit kinder to yourself, do you think?
It can be hard to understand the concept of letting go and accepting insomnia — and, without a clear understanding, it sure can be hard to put into practice! What is your current understanding of the concept and, if you have been trying to put that into practice, how have you been doing that?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing! The key insights/tips you shared that really stood out to me were:
* When you close your eyes, don’t create any expectations for sleep
* Refocus attention away from trying to make sleep happen or trying to control your mind
* Engage in an alternative activity if you find yourself struggling during the night
* Don’t bother checking the time throughout the nightA common theme among guest discussions in the Insomnia Coach podcast seems to be that:
* The less effort we put into sleep,
* The more attention is moved away from sleep and toward engaging in actions that are important and that move us toward the life we want to live…… the less power and influence sleep tends to have.
It sounds as though the theme associated with your experience is quite similar!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Ginge and welcome to the forum! When you find that sense of stress wearing off during the day, are you actively trying to get rid of the stress or does it just seem to go away by itself?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum and I am sorry to hear of everything you are dealing with and going through. That all sounds really difficult.
It sounds as though you’ve sure tried a lot to fix your situation — nobody could accuse you of not taking this seriously and nobody could call you lazy, right?! You’re trying hard to problem solve and to fix the situation you find yourself in. That’s admirable.
Since you’ve tried so much and nothing seems to be working for you over the long term, what might that suggest in terms of the value of ongoing trying and ongoing effort to make a certain amount or type of sleep happen? When you think back to a year ago, did sleep require so much effort and trying and experimentation?
You mentioned that you miss living — do you feel as though your life is kind of on hold until you get this all figured out? If so, what might be the benefits of releasing that hold and doing things that matter right now — even while insomnia (and any difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with it) are still present?
There is always hope and there’s nothing unique or unusual in your experience — you definitely are not alone!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
That can feel confusing and unusual, but it’s natural and normal!
Many people experience periods of sleep disruption when there’s a change in their lives or their routines. What matters is how you respond — do you get pulled back into the struggle that comes from trying to fight or avoid insomnia and the difficult thoughts and feelings that can come with it (where does that approach usually get you)?
Or, do you acknowledge what’s going on, be kind to yourself, and refocus your attention on doing stuff that matters — actions that keep you moving toward the life you want to live and the person you want to be?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It can be hard to stay positive — that’s typically a feeling that happens inside us so we don’t usually have a whole lot of control over that stuff.
It might be a bit easier to *act* positive — to ensure your actions are aligned with your values and that they’re keeping you moving toward the life you want to live, even when things feel difficult.
Your actions are something you likely have more control over and they will determine how much power and influence all the difficult stuff that seems to be out of your control might have over your life.
I hope there’s something useful here and I wish you all the best. This is not easy.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
That’s quite common so you’re not alone there!
Before sleep was an issue, did you put as much effort into trying to calm your mind?
Based on your experience, how is trying to calm your mind working for you?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Laura! Difficult nights from time to time come with being a human being — just as difficult days from time to time come with being a human being.
Sleep can happen no matter what thoughts your brain is generating and no matter what feelings you are experiencing.
What can make sleep so much more difficult is reaching for a (metaphorical!) sword and shield, covering your body in a heavy suit of armor, and going to war with your mind as you try to fight or avoid or otherwise control your mind. After all, how likely is sleep to happen if you are engaged in a war with an invisible enemy each night?
From reading your post it sounds as though trying to fight or avoid certain thoughts and feelings or trying to control stuff that’s going on inside you doesn’t seem to be working — would you say that’s accurate? If so, perhaps that might be the next area to explore on your journey?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
How have you been getting on since you posted? As you implied, dealing with insomnia in a more workable way can often require more than the implementation or adjustment of a sleep window — that can be a really helpful start, though!
If you prefer to stay in bed when you are awake at night, I think it’s OK to do just that — especially if getting out of bed seems to make things even more difficult. What can be helpful is using those periods of wakefulness as opportunities to practice and build skill in experiencing wakefulness with a bit less struggle.
It sounds as though you are dealing with a lot of really difficult thoughts and feelings at the current time — and that’s often a big part of the insomnia struggle. It also sounds as though at least some of those thoughts and feelings contain important information — they are reminding you of how important your family is to you. How important it is for you to be there for your son.
Fortunately, those are all actions you can still do, even in the presence of insomnia and even in the presence of difficult thoughts and feelings. So, perhaps you don’t need to try fighting or avoiding those thoughts and feelings, especially if your experience is telling you that only creates more struggle?
I hope there’s something useful here and I wish you all the best. You are not alone.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Sleep drive is one part of the “requirement” for sleep to happen (in other words, we need to be awake for long enough). For the best conditions for sleep, there also needs to be a lack of effort to make sleep happen — a lack of attachment to sleep itself.
There’s a possibility that some sleep is happening over a seven day period — even though it can feel absolutely certain that no sleep whatsoever has happened — since our arousal system can’t usually suspend sleep for that long of a period without the balloon bursting!
It’s OK to think about sleep — your brain will think about whatever it chooses to think about. What matters is how you respond to those thoughts. Do you engage in a battle with them, trying to fight or avoid them? Are they controlling your actions in a way that is pulling you away from doing things that matter and from living the life you want to live?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
How are you practicing acceptance and not fighting? If I was in the same room as you when you were practicing that, what would I see you doing?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Being afraid of the possibility of getting two hours of sleep for six weeks is totally understandable! That might happen and it might not happen — nobody can predict the future (as far as I know)!
Does your experience tell you that you can directly and permanently make a certain amount or type of sleep happen through effort? If not, where does trying get you?
What you can always control are your actions — and it’s your actions that will determine your level of struggle and how much power and influence sleep (and the thoughts and feelings that can come with insomnia) will have over your life.
Identifying that trying to fight or avoid difficult thoughts and feelings is something that’s creating a struggle suggests that an alternative approach there might be worth exploring. What might that look like, do you think?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Ugh, sorry to hear of the illness that struck your family — that was no doubt very stressful and generated lots of difficult thoughts and feelings as your brain did its job of looking out for you and reminding you of how important your family is to you. I am glad to know everyone is feeling better!
It’s great to hear that once your family recovered you continued to do things that matter and went through the Christmas period in a way that was aligned with your values and that kept you moving toward the life you want to live and the person you want to be
The return of difficult nights is hard — it’s also normal, especially when there are clear stressors involved. Just as difficult days happen from time to time, difficult nights happen from time to time as well. So, you are not alone — and what matters now is how you respond.
In terms of dealing with difficult nights when they show up again, what have you learned from the course and what had you been practicing and finding helpful up to the time when illness hit your family? Which of those actions/skills/approaches could you start practicing (or continue to practice), do you think?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
