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I’ve worked with many clients who were pregnant — how have you been getting on since you posted, Jenna?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Judi. Things sound really difficult — how have you been getting on since you posted?
It sure sounds as though you’ve done a lot to try to make sleep happen and to fight or avoid the difficult thoughts and feelings that often come with insomnia. If you’re still struggling, I wonder if all the effort might be contributing to the struggle?
Have you asked others how they make sleep happen? What does the best sleeper you know do to make sleep happen? I wonder if there might be an insight there?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Yes, it is difficult! Learning new skills is rarely easy 🙂
The AWAKE exercise is intended to help you experience wakefulness in a more workable way.
As a bonus, it might help create better conditions for sleep since sleep is probably more likely to happen when we aren’t on that war horse and suited up in armor, ready to battle wakefulness and whatever is going on in our minds, right?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You can breathe however you like when practicing the AWAKE exercise! If your goal with your breathing is to “feel better”, you might be setting yourself up for a bit of a struggle (since we can’t really control how we feel) — so I’d suggest simply breathing in a way that you are comfortable with.
In terms of how to let the mind be, I think this is part of the process of working through either the NOW or the AWAKE exercises. It starts with acknowledgement, then involves opening up and allowing your thoughts and feelings to exist (even if you wish they didn’t exist, there they are).
If you are experiencing a lot of thoughts all at once, you might start with the most prominent or difficult ones first. You don’t need to try doing them all at once and it’s OK for other thoughts and feelings to show up after you’ve already acknowledged others.
In terms of trying to calm yourself when anxiety arrives, that might be something that switches the struggle switch on — because you’re trying to fight or avoid feeling a certain way.
Your goal isn’t to change what you’re thinking or feeling — it’s to practice responding to all this difficult stuff in a more workable way. A way that helps you practice moving away from struggling and doing things that matter to you, even when difficult thoughts and feelings show up.
Does this help?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Why are you trying to change your thoughts? Has that proven effective in the past? Even if you are able to temporarily distract yourself or push certain thoughts and feelings away, they always come back don’t they? So, why engage in all that effort and struggle?
I wonder whether engaging in actions that help you live the kind of life you want to live (such as spending time with family in Germany) might contribute more to a rich and meaningful life compared to whatever thoughts and feelings your mind might generate as it does its job of looking out for you?
Perhaps practicing the NOW exercise when your mind tries to pull you away from where you are and when it tries to pull you away from doing things that matter might be useful? Not as a way to control your mind, but as a way to practice refocusing on where you are and what you are doing — engaging in actions that will keep you moving toward the life you want to live, even when difficult thoughts and feelings show up.
Accepting that you won’t always feel relaxed might be a helpful way of moving you away from struggle! Is it even possible to live a rich and meaningful life without difficult thoughts and feelings showing up?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
If you’re using any of what you’re learning in this course in an attempt to shrug off unease or change any of the thoughts or feelings you experience as a human being, you’re going to be setting yourself up for an ongoing struggle — since that’s all out of your control!
It’s great that you are able to identify your thoughts and feelings (and the stories your problem solving mind comes up with as it does its job of looking out for you) with such clarity! That will likely help when it comes to ongoing practice of the AWAKE and NOW exercises.
Remember your goal with the AWAKE exercise isn’t to make you calm and relaxed — for as long as that’s your goal, you’re going to struggle. The goal with the AWAKE exercise is to help you practice moving away from struggle. To help you practice experiencing wakefulness (and all the thoughts and feelings that might come with it) in a more workable way.
Of course your mind will have visions of the next day and come up with all different stories. That’s its job! You can either engage in a struggle and engage in a battle with your mind, or you can remove yourself from the struggle and allow your mind to do what it’s going to do anyway!
As you suggested, you’re learning new skills here — and new skills require ongoing practice, right?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds as though you have an understandable concern there — and yet, I wonder whether talking to others about insomnia might serve as a way of empowering yourself? Perhaps it might be a way to free yourself from the fear of insomnia, to use your experience and knowledge in a positive way, to perhaps turn the tables on insomnia completely?
The only way you can end up “identifying” again with insomnia is if you allow insomnia to control your actions and determine how you live your life!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I appreciate you sharing, Tony — and all the best for 2023!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Tony!
You have access to the course for six months from the day you enrolled.
Which parts of the course have you found most helpful up to this point?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It’s great to hear that you’ve been practicing the NOW exercise when these thoughts and feelings are showing up.
Remember the goal isn’t to get rid of them — it’s to help you move away from struggling with them. To help you practice allowing them to come and go. To help you practice doing things that are important, even in their presence.
It sounds as though there might be two ways to respond to those difficult thoughts.
One way would be to not travel. To not visit family. To act in a way that will help you avoid the difficult thoughts and feelings you described in your post.
Would that help you move toward the life you want to live and eliminate difficult thoughts and feelings forever?
If so, perhaps that might be an appropriate response.
Another way to respond would be to acknowledge those difficult thoughts and feelings. To make space for them to come and go as they please. Perhaps to recognize that they come from a good place (your brain doing its job and looking out for you — thanks, brain!). To be kind to yourself in return, and then to travel because that’s important to you.
Would that help you move toward the life you want to live, even in the presence of all that difficult stuff?
We cannot control what goes on inside our minds. We can’t make ourselves not feel anxious and we can’t even make ourselves enjoy the activities we engage in — even the important ones.
Ultimately, we can do things that matter, even in the presence of difficult thoughts and feelings and even when they don’t feel enjoyable.
Or we can stop doing things that matter in order to avoid certain thoughts and feelings — but they always send up coming back anyway, right?
Is there anything useful here?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Mel! Yes, it can be difficult to open up and allow difficult thoughts and feelings to come and go as they please — especially if you’ve been spending a lot of time practicing engaging in a struggle with them instead. That’s often a far more familiar approach and, as such, you probably have a lot more skill at engaging in struggle!
How comfortable does it feel to engage in a battle with your thoughts and feelings? How effective is that approach? If it’s comfortable and you are able to get rid of certain thoughts and feelings so they never come back, that’s great — no need to do anything different!
If the battle and the struggle doesn’t feel comfortable, perhaps a different approach might be worth practicing? If you’re going to experience discomfort either way, how about experiencing the discomfort of the thoughts and feelings themselves — rather than adding the discomfort of struggle on top of all that?
I wonder if practicing the NOW exercise might be a useful way to respond to the wandering mind and the struggle that occurs when you’re trying to do more meaningful things (such as practicing tai chi)?
A lot of this stuff is difficult because it’s so new. It makes sense that anything new requires practice, right? Skills usually take time to develop and require ongoing practice!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Yikes, sorry to hear that! How are you feeling now? I don’t think there’s any need to “go back” — you might want to keep moving forward and start observing your sleep window from this point on if you are feeling better.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Judi! Did stopping work get rid of all the really difficult stuff you described in your opening post?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
My guess is this requires a conversation with your husband so you might be able to decide the approach that’s right for you and the kind of life you want to live.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thank you for sharing this big insight with us, Carli!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
