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Thanks for sharing, @Bsue — and good on you for getting some practice in with the AWAKE exercise and the 3 Good Things exercise! You are making change happen by taking action!
Many people find the AWAKE exercise difficult and clunky at first — there’s a lot there and a lot to remember (and play around with)! As with any skill, it tends to get a bit easier with ongoing practice. As you shared, the AWAKE exercise is aligned in many ways with meditation — acknowledging and observing rather than controlling and battling.
In what ways is the 3 Good Things exercise proving to be positive for you?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds as though sleep meds don’t make you feel good, come with side-effects, and the action of taking them isn’t aligned with who you are or who you want to be. It also sounds as though they generate more anxiety and worry.
What’s good about continuing to take medication? What would be bad about moving away from medication? Upon reflection, what do you feel you’d like to do with the medication and how will you make that happen?
If sleep is a concern, your problem-solving mind is going to generate thoughts about it. That’s its job. And, with difficult thoughts often come difficult feelings and bodily sensations (although if you are concerned about chest tightness I would encourage you to get that checked out by a doctor).
Since this stuff doesn’t feel good, we are naturally inclined to try to get rid of these thoughts and feelings — which makes complete sense. And yet, that often draws us into a struggle that makes things more difficult and consumes more of our energy and attention. What might things be like if thoughts and feelings could come and go as they pleased, without them creating such a struggle?
We’ll be exploring this in more detail in Week 2 — but, in the meantime, have you tried responding to these thoughts with an acknowledgement (rather than starting a battle) and perhaps even thanking your brain for looking out for you (thanks, brain!)?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You are definitely not a failure — you are clearly a great self-advocate for yourself and you demonstrate great awareness of who you are and who you want to be.
You are taking medication and supplements because you feel that’s right for you — and you are the expert on you.
Many people who are taking medication or supplements (but don’t want to be) find that working through this course and committing to behavioral change gives them alternative options and more confidence to start moving away from medication and supplements when they are ready to do so.
As suggested by @hiker, it’s important not to make any changes to your medication without talking to your doctor first (as I am sure you are very aware off, as a retired nurse)!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Setting an alarm clock can be helpful — otherwise, how will you be sure to get out of bed by the end of your sleep window while also not checking the time during your sleep window?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Great question! I would suggest calculating a sleep window based on how you are currently sleeping, regardless of whether you are taking medication or not. And, starting with the time you want to be getting out of bed to start your day can be helpful.
Remember that you don’t calculate a sleep window based on the sleep you want to be getting — it’s based on the sleep you are currently getting.
Does this help?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Where you sleep is completely up to you! You might ask yourself this — is sleeping on the couch an action that reflects who you are, who you want to be, and is it an action that moves you closer to the life you want to live? If yes — great! If not, why continue to pursue such an action?
Bonus question: Is avoidance of wakefulness a workable long-term strategy?
PS: If you can sleep on the couch then you can sleep anywhere else, if that’s what you choose to do!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Your honest introspection, awareness, and desire and willingness to learn are all strengths that will serve you well as you continue to work through the course and practice what you’ll be exploring here 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It seems that naps might influence your sleep at night and they might not. Of course, daytime sleep can reduce sleep drive and that will be less of an issue the earlier a nap is taken and the shorter it is in length. So, with all this in mind, perhaps in connection to sleep at night, daytime naps might be “neutral”.
What about when it comes to living the life you want to live? Do you have to say “no” to things that move you toward the life you want to live in order to say “yes” to a nap? In other words, does napping move you closer to the life you want to live or further away from the life you want to live?
As you might be realizing, there’s no clear and universal answer to whether naps are “good” or “bad” here. What matters most is your intent — what you are trying to achieve and how workable that is as a goal.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing, @Gdurity — I hope you are able to give yourself credit for continuing to do things that matter, even after a really rough night and even in the presence of frustration and anxiety.
Your commitment to engage in actions that serve YOU (rather than the insomnia gremlin) enabled you to keep moving toward your goals. It sure sounds as though going on the hike was more life enriching than the alternative of staying home and, as you shared, you have proven to yourself that you can act independently of whatever your problem-solving mind might be saying (so there’s no need to fight those thoughts or stories).
You definitely are not alone and you definitely are not broken. You are a human being and you are reclaiming your life from insomnia!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
That’s an interesting idea, @Rozey — I think that could be a helpful way to practice making space for thoughts and feelings to be present with less resistance and help you identify (and be more comfortable with) certain thoughts and feelings. You are playing around with — and allowing yourself to experience — the full range of natural and normal human thoughts, feelings, and emotions.
@lizzyc — for as long as your (understandable!) intent is to get the buzz to dissipate, get rid of frustration, get rid of anxiety, or make sleep happen you will probably continue to find things difficult since (as your experience tells you) those things cannot be controlled through effort.Making space means reducing resistance, moving away from battling, moving away from fighting, dropping that “tug of war” rope, being more of a curious observer, giving permission for thoughts and feelings to come and go (especially since they’ll do that as they choose anyway).
The less space we give our thoughts and feelings, the more likely they are to get stuck. Has that been your experience?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for the great questions!
Waking during the night is a normal part of sleep. It’s perfectly OK to stay in bed until your sleep window ends — especially if you are finding that to be relaxing and comfortable!
If you were to shorten your sleep window, what would your goal or intent be? If it’s to make a certain amount or type of sleep happen you might be using the sleep window as a sleep effort — and, typically, the more effort we put into sleep (the more we try to control it) the more we are going to struggle with it. Has that been your experience?
A desire for 6.5 hours of sleep is understandable — and you aren’t feeling tired during the day and you are consistently getting around 5.5 hours of sleep and you cannot control sleep duration. So, what’s the best way to respond to that desire do you think?
Thoughts don’t really wake us up — they are a constant presence. They typically become difficult when we are trying to fight or avoid them. If you aren’t trying to fight or avoid your thoughts then there might not be any need to practice the AWAKE exercise, since there’s no struggle.
There’s no problem with spending time awake in bed — what we really want to do here is move away from trying to make a certain amount or type of sleep happen (or trying to control our minds) because that’s what creates (and fuels) an ongoing struggle. Sleep works best when we allow it to do whatever it chooses.
I hope there’s something useful here!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It’s a good question. Alcohol can definitely disrupt sleep as can perhaps billions or even trillions of other things.
So we have two choices here.
We can spend our lives trying to identify and avoid all the things that might disrupt our sleep, get pulled away from doing things that matter to us, and maybe enjoy some nights of better sleep as a result (and maybe not).
Or, we can spend our lives doing things that matter to us, independently of sleep, and acknowledge that we might experience some sleep disruption from time to time (and maybe not).
I’d suggest choosing the option you think is most workable and will better help you live the life you want to live. The choice, as always, is yours!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
This is very common and not unusual at all!
Let me ask you this: Is there a difference in your intent before your sleep window begins compared to after it begins and you are in bed?
In other words, before the sleep window begins is your goal different compared to after the sleep window begins? If so, is there an insight there that might help explain why sleepiness seems to disappear?
On a separate note, when you get up to avoid the mind racing and anxiety, does that mean that getting up guarantees that your mind never races and you never experience anxiety?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Sounds like it might be worth an experiment, @GC1500!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Ups and downs are all part of the journey.
If you struggle with visualization, you aren’t alone — this lesson might be helpful: If Visualization Is Difficult.
You aren’t looking to find comfort in what you are thinking and feeling or even change what you are thinking or feeling at night. When that’s our intent we can get pulled into a struggle since that’s like trying to turn the moon into cheese — we have a complete absence of control over that and trying to control what cannot be controlled only creates struggle, which makes things even more difficult.
The goal of the AWAKE exercise is to practice building skill in experiencing wakefulness and all the thoughts and feelings that can come with it with less struggle. You aren’t trying to fool yourself into wanting these thoughts and feelings, you aren’t trying to think positive, you are just practicing not going to war with them — since going to war consumes all your energy, creates more struggle, and makes everything even more difficult (and perhaps more scary, too).
As for Experiencing wakefulness, it doesn’t matter if watching TV or reading makes you wide awake because you aren’t trying to make sleep happen! What matters is this: is watching TV or reading more appealing than battling with all these invisible enemies? If so, it’s probably a more workable way of responding compared to donning the suit of armor and going to war.
Sleep doesn’t care what the time is — you can look at the time or not look at the time. What matters more is your intent and your experience on the usefulness of looking at the time. What does checking the time (or not checking the time) do for you? How does that action serve you? Many people find that checking the clock throughout the night only makes things more difficult — but everyone is different and you are the expert on you!
You might want to revisit this lesson from Week 2, specifically the first question: “Do I really need to avoid checking the time when my sleep window begins?”.
It can feel as though a return of difficult nights is going to lead to a downward spiral but the fact is, with every difficult night you are building more sleep pressure — so better nights become more likely. And, with every difficult night you have the opportunity to practice (and build skill in) responding to this difficult stuff in a more workable way.
I hope there’s something useful here!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
