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Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Zuz! Distraction can sometimes be helpful in the short-term — it can require a lot of effort to consciously “not think” about something, though (and, those thoughts will typically come back at some point anyway).
Developing skill in reducing our resistance to certain thoughts and feelings (and wakefulness itself) can sometimes be a more helpful longer-term strategy — and we’ll be exploring that in more detail as you work through the course!
Doing something that you enjoy or that is otherwise aligned with your interests and values can be more productive than engaging in efforts to control sleep, your thoughts, or your feelings — especially if your experience suggests those things cannot be directly or permanently controlled anyway!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
This is great to hear! It sounds as though you are taking the skills you have been practicing in this course and are applying them in other areas of your life, too (such as dealing with the presence of pain). That’s a reflection of your growing mastery 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds as though things are changing for the better — thank you for sharing your observations with us!
Waking during the night is a normal part of sleep. If you don’t fall back to sleep, then one (or more) of the following could be influencing this:
1. Your body has decided you don’t need more sleep,
2. You might be putting pressure on yourself to fall back to sleep,
3. You might be putting effort into falling back to sleep/trying to make more sleep happen,
4. You might be trying to fight any thoughts/feelings that are showing up,
5. You might have a strong attachment/desire to get a certain amount/type of sleep.You mentioned that you feel confused as to why you don’t fall back to sleep if you wake during your sleep window and don’t try to force sleep. Let me ask you this — do you have the same degree of confusion when you want to spend the day outdoors, so you don’t try to force sunshine, and yet the day remains cloudy?
Trying to force sleep makes conditions more difficult for sleep to happen. Not trying to force sleep improves conditions for sleep but it’s still no guarantee that sleep will happen — since sleep is out of our direct control.
Is there anything helpful here?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Difficult nights are all part of the journey, Rosa — just as we all have difficult days from time to time, we all have difficult nights from time to time.
What matters is how we respond — do we go back to the old ways of battling and trying to fight or avoid wakefulness and the thoughts and feelings that come along for the ride (even though we know that doesn’t work) or do we acknowledge what’s going on, be kind to ourselves, and continue to practice building skill in responding to all this difficult stuff with less struggle?
This isn’t easy. Change, action, and practice is hard. And, doing things that matter and learning new skills usually requires a lot of effort, involves difficulty and challenge, and comes with struggle. You aren’t alone. This feels hard because it is hard. There are going to be ups and downs — that’s natural and normal. And you always have the choice and the power when it comes to how to respond. Action is what matters.
I hope there’s something helpful here and I wish you all the best.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for the update! It sounds as though you have discovered that sleep doesn’t care what the time is — it just cares that you are sleepy enough for sleep and that it is allowed to do what it wants to do, when it wants to do it, and how it wants to do it!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
The mind is a curious thing — thank you so much for sharing your observations and experience!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
This is a great question!
Jet lag is usually an unavoidable “cost” of travel — like dealing with crowds, delays, stress, traffic, and expensive airport food!
What might help make the inevitable adjustment period a bit easier/less disruptive is to immediately follow whatever the local time in your destination might be, as soon as you get there.
So, if you arrive at your destination during the day, you might want to remain awake until it’s around your usual bedtime in your new destination (in other words, if you usually go to bed around 10:00 PM at home then see if you can delay going to bed until 10:00 PM — local time — wherever you are in the world, too).
If you reach your destination at a time when you’d normally be sleeping, you might want to grab a bit of sleep and then try to get up at your normal time — or you can try to plough through until your normal bed time. The accumulated sleep pressure will help create good conditions for sleep the following night and might help you adapt to the new timezone a bit quicker.
Ultimately, I think the most important thing is to be kind to yourself, give yourself permission to experience some sleep disruption as you adjust (perhaps think of it as a necessary cost to live the life you want to live) and then refocus your attention on where you are and what you’ll be doing. That will almost certainly have more influence over your life, be more enriching, and be more memorable compared to how you slept when traveling 🙂
Does this help?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello again, Priyanka!
I sleep great and yet I also feel very tired around 5:00 PM, too!
Perhaps the best way to respond to this is to explore our level of control. Can we directly and permanently control feeling tired? Can we directly and permanently control the amount or type of sleep we get?
When we reflect on our experience, the answer is usually “no”. And so, perhaps the best thing to do is ensure our response to this difficult stuff is workable; that it involves actions we have control over. So, for example, we can acknowledge what’s happening, be kind to ourselves in return, and continue to do things that keep us moving closer to the life we want to live.
Light sleep is still sleep, and the body controls sleep architecture and sleep stages all by itself. Sleep might feel lighter/less restful (often because we are paying more attention to it and maybe struggling with wakefulness during the night) but, behind the scenes, your body will always ensure you get the right amount of deep sleep (which it will always prioritize) and the minimum amount of sleep you need.
If you feel sleepy and comfortable when you wake during the night, there’s no need to do anything — you can simply rest! If you find yourself starting to struggle, that’s when you have the opportunity to practice the AWAKE exercise.
Does this provide you with any additional clarity?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
11:00 PM is pretty close to 12:30 AM — and when on vacation, the experience of being in a new place is probably more important, will be more memorable, and will be more of an enriching contribution to your life than the time you go to bed at night!
If you feel comfortable with a sleep window of 11:00 PM to 7:00 AM, feel free to stick with that! The sleep window isn’t something that’s supposed to make a certain amount or type of sleep happen — it’s merely one tool that can help you move away from chasing after sleep.
When it comes to the AWAKE practice, you can practice it whenever you like — there’s no need to practice it if there’s no struggle present (although you can if you want to)! Really, it’s an exercise intended to be practiced if/when you find yourself struggling with being awake — and you can practice it in bed or out of bed (your choice).
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds as though the additional free time you had in the evening turned out to be a more positive experience than you might have been expecting — thanks for sharing that with us!
When it comes to yoga nidra/NSDR/any other action, I would suggest asking yourself who (or what!) is being served by that action.
Are you serving yourself — in other words, is that action something that reflects your identity, values, and priorities? Is it something you’d be doing (or want to be doing) independently of sleep? If so, wonderful — how could that be a bad thing?
Or, is it an action that serves something/someone else (for example, sleep)? If it’s an action that’s intended to protect/fight/avoid or control things that your experience suggests cannot be directly or permanently controlled (such as sleep, thoughts, feelings) perhaps it might be less useful.
Does this help any?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
There are no silly questions, Matthew!
It’s great that you are coming up with a workable plan for dealing with potential thoughts and feelings that might show up when you travel. You can either engage in a battle with thoughts, feelings, being awake — or you can practice acknowledging them and refocusing your attention on where you are, what you are doing, and what matters to you. Notice and observe or battle.
Ultimately, perhaps it comes down to this — what will help you best live the life you want to live and what feels most workable?
Trying to make a certain type of sleep/thought/feeling happen or doing things that matter (such as traveling) regardless of sleep/thoughts/feelings? And, which of those things can you directly control?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I appreciate you letting me know, Matthew. What’s your plan, moving forward?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for the question, ilsundal!
Waking is a normal part of sleep and it can happen for obvious reasons (such as needing to pee) and it can happen for no obvious reason.
What tends to make these awakenings more difficult are our attempts to fight or avoid them or otherwise “figure them out”.
Of course, there might be some common sense/straightforward things you can do if there’s an obvious cause (stop drinking fluids a certain time before bed if you always need to pee during the night, for example) but beyond that, we might be more likely to get pulled into a struggle the more we try to figure out something that cannot really be controlled. And that struggle can consume our energy and attention and make things more difficult.
It also sounds as though your experience is telling you that the more you live your life the way you want to live it — the more you engage in actions and behaviors that matter to you — the more effortless sleep seems to become and the less attention it seems to require (or consume).
With all this in mind, what do you feel would be the most workable way to respond to these awakenings?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Great! Do let us know if you end up finding that helpful 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
That vacation sounds fantastic, Priyanka — thank you for sharing! You are clearly getting your life back from insomnia and doing things that matter to you. You are leading a rich and meaningful life, independently of sleep.
Perhaps that sense of greater sleepiness is a sign that there’s less struggle and less of a threat associated with sleep/wakefulness?
In terms of that morning sleepiness — how long does it tend to stick around for? Is the sleepiness true sleepiness (as in, it’s hard for you to stay awake) or is it fatigue/grogginess? Do you feel as though if you stayed in bed, you would continue to sleep?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
