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That’s interesting. Thanks for sharing!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Your experience isn’t unique or unusual and, if there’s no medical explanation, it’s likely a symptom of hyperarousal. For as long as you try to fight or avoid hyperarousal you are more likely to get tangled up in a struggle with it that can make it more difficult and make sleep less likely.
It makes sense that it feel uncontrollable — because it isn’t! If it was controllable, you wouldn’t be in this situation, right? You’d have “controlled it away”! Perhaps the control agenda (which is TOTALLY understandable) is a big source of the struggle?
We’ll be really exploring all these issues in a lot more detail as you work through the course 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Those sensations are really difficult, aren’t they? If there’s no medical explanation for them, they could be a physical symptom of hyperarousal — your brain doing its job of looking out for you and trying to protect you. It’s just that it’s trying so hard, it’s getting in the way a bit — kind of like an over-enthusiastic friend who is always checking in on you and always wanting to hang out!
The thing with hyperarousal is, it comes from a good place — but it doesn’t feel good, so our normal response is to try to fight or avoid it.
Unfortunately, that strategy doesn’t usually help — if you saw a child about to cross the road as a truck was speeding toward them, you’d yell at that child to stop, right?
If they ignored you, what would you do? Stop yelling and let them cross the road and get mown down by that truck? You’d probably yell even louder and more frantically, right?
And that’s what our brain can end up doing if we try to fight or avoid hyperarousal — it’s looking out for us, thinking there’s a threat present and we are ignoring it. So, it’s going to yell louder and generate even more hyperarousal in response.
So, with all this in mind, perhaps it might be helpful to practice responding in a different way? Instead of trying to fight or avoid, you might try acknowledging the thoughts and feelings your brain is generating (even though they can feel really unpleasant). If you’re feeling really openminded, perhaps you might even thank your brain for looking out for you!
And, at the same time, perhaps it might be helpful to explore ways you might be able to train your brain that wakefulness isn’t a threat it needs to be so alert to protect you from at night? Perhaps you might consider ways of experiencing wakefulness with less struggle. If there’s not a nightly battle occurring when wakefulness shows up, perhaps your brain can learn that it’s not something it needs to be so alert to protect you from at night?
I hope there’s something useful here!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I’ve translated your post, courtesy of Google Translate, below. Moving forward, I would suggest posting in English if possible, since that is the language used in this forum:
I want to heal
I haven’t slept for 5 days, I became anxious for not doing it, I was afraid that night would come, I started taking a medication that helped me but I am working on the psychological issue together, exercising and sleeping, I don’t know how I feel I am very afraid of depending on the sleeping pill, I want to be able to leave it and sleep like before, I really hope that these emails will help me get out of this hell
Welcome to the forum. It sounds as though the medication is something you don’t feel comfortable with — have you shared that with your doctor?
The good news is that the human body doesn’t require medication to generate sleep. What it needs is for us to not be involved in the process of sleep! The more we try to make it happen, the more difficult it becomes. And, when it becomes difficult, we also experience a lot of difficult thoughts and feelings — and, because they don’t feel good, we try to fight or avoid them. Then, before we know it, we are trapped in a vicious cycle and get stuck.
So what you are experiencing is not unique or unusual. Difficult, for sure. But not unique or unusual.
I hope you find the free sleep training emails helpful — and if you have any questions, feel free to post them here!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Yup, that makes sense — the more you try to fight or avoid certain thoughts and feelings, the more difficult they can become. You can’t control what your mind chooses to do — but you can change how you respond to what it chooses to do. Do you feel there might be any benefit to moving away from the endless battle with your mind night after night (and perhaps day after day, too)?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I am not sure I’ve come across anyone who is able to permanently control their minds so they can permanently lower arousal — and anyone who could do that might not live for very long since arousal is something the brain generates as it does its job of looking out for us!
Perhaps arousal becomes more difficult when we try to fight or avoid it?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Great questions and completely legitimate and valid concerns there!
First, it can be helpful to recognize that sleep deprivation is not the same as chronic insomnia.
Secondly there’s no evidence that chronic insomnia causes any health problem — but it can certainly make living the kind of life we want to live a lot more difficult!
Sleep always happens in the end — it’s impossible to stay awake indefinitely. And, the body will always generate — at the very least — the minimum amount of sleep it needs as long as it is given the opportunity to do so.
This stuff is difficult, no doubt about it. I hope there’s something useful here.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Questioning the rules — ah, yes that is something I like to do!
Ultimately, I think it’s worth thinking back to when sleep was no problem whatsoever. How many rules did you have in place back then? Is there an insight there?
Of course, some rules can be helpful if we are tangled up in a struggle trying to make sleep happen, trying to get rid of wakefulness, and trying to fight or avoid the difficult thoughts and feelings that can come with insomnia.
A helpful rule, for example, might involve having an earliest possible bedtime and a consistent out of bed time. This can help you move away from chasing after sleep.
Another helpful rule might include doing at least one thing that’s important to you every day, independently of sleep. This helps keep you moving toward the life you want to live, even when all this difficult stuff is present.
An unhelpful rule might involve taking things away from your life, doing less of the things that matter, in an attempt to make sleep happen or to control what your mind thinks or what feelings it chooses to generate. That’s because you can’t control that stuff, and the more you try, the more difficult it can become.
I don’t think there’s any need to get out of bed just because you’ve been awake for a certain amount of time. If you find yourself really struggling with nighttime wakefulness, you might want to do something else that will help you experience the wakefulness with less struggle — and I think it’s OK to do something else in bed, if you’d rather not get out of bed.
I hope there’s something useful here!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I can only imagine how difficult (and unhelpful) such a statement must have been to hear! Did your therapist tell you why, after just eight nights, they felt that the approach they were sharing with you might not work for you?
Everyone experiences improvements on their own timeline — there’s no one-size-fits-all here. And, in the beginning, things might even feel more difficult as you adjust to a new approach.
Have you been implementing any other changes, besides the sleep window?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
When you are on the couch and there’s no effort or pressure to make sleep happen, it seems to happen so effortlessly, right? Perhaps there’s a useful insight there!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
That sure can be difficult — especially if we get tangled up in a struggle trying to fight or avoid those awakenings.
First, I think it’s helpful to recognize that waking during the night is a normal part of sleep. Everyone does it. What can make falling back to sleep more difficult is trying to make sleep happen. Engaging in a battle with the wakefulness, trying to fight or avoid it.
How do you currently respond to those awakenings when they happen and how workable is that response proving to be?
Do you think it might be useful to not check the time when you wake at night, or is that something that your experience tells you will make it easier to fall back to sleep?
Since you know from experience that you can’t control sleep — and the more you try, the more difficult things can become — what do you think would be a workable way to respond to the awakenings you described?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds as though you are responding to nighttime wakefulness in a way that doesn’t involve struggle — great stuff 🙂
When sleep wasn’t a concern, were you always hoping to feel sleepy and worried about the time at night before you went to bed? If not, I wonder why things are different now? How helpful is that pursuit of sleepiness (and sleep!) proving to be?
What kind of things does your mind start to tell you when sleepiness doesn’t show up or when you don’t fall asleep within a certain amount of time? And, how do you respond to those thoughts/ feelings/ stories?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It sounds as though your experience is telling you that it might be helpful to go to bed only when you’re truly sleepy enough for sleep.
With that being said, wakefulness itself isn’t really an issue (it’s a normal part of sleep) — it tends to become problematic when we start trying to fight or avoid it.
How have you been responding to nighttime wakefulness when it shows up?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Yes, sleep restriction is awful terminology — that’s why I don’t use it in the course materials! Your alternatives are a lot better 🙂
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing, Mark! No need to practice the AWAKE exercise if you aren’t finding yourself struggling with nighttime wakefulness!
How are you responding to the appearance of that anxiety and the stories your mind might generate as it does its job of looking out for you an hour or two before your usual bedtime?
I appreciate you sharing your experience with the 3 good things exercise and that you found ending the day by expanding your focus on some good stuff has done you nothing bad!!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
