Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
Welcome to the forum, @carolineh!
If you don’t sleep well, you have not failed — because you have no control over sleep! There is nothing you can do to make yourself fall asleep or fall back to sleep (other than being awake for long enough). There is certainly nothing you can do to make yourself sleep for a certain amount of time!
As you pointed out, it’s often our reaction to sleep (or wakefulness!) that can perpetuate sleep disruption. If we worry or even panic about sleep, we increase arousal and our body then needs to generate more sleep drive (spend more time awake) to overpower that arousal.
However, sleep always happens in the end, because sleep drive always wins in the end.
Ultimately, we want to lower arousal so we don’t need to generate quite so much sleep drive in order to sleep! It’s helpful, too, to use sleep drive to our advantage (by not going to bed too early, for example) and to get the body clock on our side by ensuring we’re always out of bed by the same time each day and we are active and engaged in daytime activities.
On a separate note, you might find it helpful to explore what it is about the idea of not sleeping that seems to generate such worry and anxiety — very often the thoughts we have that generate the most anxiety and worry are rarely as accurate as they first seem. Recognizing this can strip those thoughts of their power, lower arousal, and make sleep a bit easier.
I hope this helps.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
What time do you usually go to bed at night, what time do you usually get out of bed to start the day, and roughly how many hours of sleep would you say you get on an “average”night, nosleepyet?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Cyan and welcome to the forum.
Since you started to implement sleep restriction and stimulus control more consistently, what is an average night like?
What is the start time and end time of your current sleep window? How many hours of sleep do you get on an average night? What is your cue to get out of bed during the night when you are practicing stimulus control?
On a separate note, are you doing anything during the day to improve the quality of your days and shift focus/attention away from sleep?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum, glory. Sorry to hear about everything you’ve gone through this year — in such circumstances, it’s not too surprising to hear that you’ve been finding sleep to be difficult. Have you asked your doctor about cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I) to see if they think you’d be a good candidate? Studies show that CBT-I is a far more effective treatment for chronic insomnia than any sleeping pill.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum, Leslie. Right away, I see a golden opportunity for you to spend less time awake during the night, struggling with sleep — you might start going to bed a bit later to help build more sleep pressure and reduce the opportunity for long periods of nighttime wakefulness.
At the current time, when do you usually go to bed at night, and what time do you usually get out of bed to start your day? How many hours of sleep would you say you get on an average night?
Calling in sick to work and canceling vacations is a completely understandable reaction to insomnia but can sometimes make daytime fatigue worse and increase sleep-related worry and anxiety since we have less opportunity to shift attention away from sleep, we become more sedentary (which can promote and intensify fatigue), and we guarantee that a difficult night of sleep has a negative outcome.
Ultimately, I see a number of opportunities for you to address the common thoughts and behaviors that perpetuate insomnia — I would really encourage you to explore the theory behind cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I) techniques so you might be able to make some changes that will improve your sleep for the long term.
I hope this helps!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome, Alison! Since you were able to improve your sleep before, there’s no reason to believe you won’t be able to improve your sleep again! Remember that it’s normal for sleep to be temporarily disrupted at times of stress or worry — I think it would be more unusual for an infection control nurse to sleep really well during a pandemic!
As we adapt to times of stress or worry, or the initial trigger of our sleep disruption is no longer an issue, sleep usually recovers by itself. If it doesn’t, you are already ahead — because you know exactly what to do to get your sleep right back on track!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You mentioned that you currently go to bed around 10:00 PM — do you feel sleepy enough for sleep around that time? What time do you normally get out of bed to start your day in the mornings?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Are you still going to bed around 11:00 PM and starting your day between 6:00 AM and 7:00 AM? If so, you might find it helpful to allot a bit less time for sleep since that can help build sleep drive and reduce the opportunity for extended periods of nighttime wakefulness.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It’s completely normal for sleep to be disrupted when we are worried, stressed, or at times of uncertainty! Usually, as we adapt or the initial trigger is no longer relevant, sleep gets right back on track all by itself.
There are some things you can do to help minimize the risk of longer-term sleep disruption — I covered this in a bit more detail in this video: What to do when stress, worry, and uncertainty lead to sleep disruption and insomnia.
I hope this helps!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It might take a few tries before you are able to follow-through with sleep restriction — the only way you can fail is if you give up entirely! Just as it might take a smoker many attempts to quit, with determination, success is always possible!
Some people find it helpful to take a “set it and forget it” approach by creating a sleep window and telling themselves they’ll stick to it for a week (or maybe two weeks) no matter what, and then evaluate how to proceed from that point onwards.
I hope this helps!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing, and welcome to the forum. There’s a lot to unpack here, but let’s see what I can cover in a forum reply without getting too in-depth or going on for too long!
The body certainly does have a time to sleep — and that time arrives once we’ve been awake for long enough! Although it can often feel as though if we don’t sleep by a certain hour of the night, we’ll be awake the whole night, there’s actually no biological explanation for why or how such a theory might be true since sleep drive continues to build with every minute of wakefulness.
What can happen, however, is we might believe that we need to fall asleep by a certain time, and then put pressure on ourselves to sleep (or put effort into sleep) and this immediately makes sleep more difficult. If we are then clock-watching and see that we haven’t fallen asleep by a certain time, we might then determine that it’s going to be impossible to fall asleep now —and this increases arousal, makes sleep more difficult, and can make our prediction a self-fulfilling prophecy!
There is nothing we can do during the night to make sleep happen because sleep cannot be controlled. So, we want to simply go to bed when we are sleepy enough for sleep (finding it hard to stay awake) and if being in bed starts to feel unpleasant, it can be helpful to get out of bed and do anything that feels more relaxing and enjoyable compared to remaining in bed when being in bed doesn’t feel good. It can also be a really good idea to avoid checking the time during the night since that can also activate the arousal system.
Sleeping pills don’t generate sleep, so any sleep you get after taking a pill is still generated entirely by you and your body! Sometimes, having a sleeping pill available (compared to just taking one at the start of the night) can be more disruptive to sleep as the mind stays more active to monitor for sleep to help you decide whether you should take a pill or not! In other words, every time you get into bed you give yourself a test — and setting ourselves tests doesn’t usually help to create good conditions for sleep!
It’s impossible not to sleep — when we’ve been awake for long enough, we will always sleep! When it comes to daytime fatigue, we can often help reduce the intensity of fatigue by being active and engaged in enjoyable/enriching daytime activities.
I hope this helps!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
As we’ve discussed privately, these ups and downs are quite common! It can sometimes be helpful to recognize that since even great sleepers don’t enjoy great sleep every single night, then it’s understandable that there will be difficult nights and difficult stretches from time to time. However, sleep drive ALWAYS wins in the end!
“Tired” in the evening can sometimes be a bit deceptive — because being tired can be different to being sleepy. When we are sleepy, we are finding it hard to stay awake and this makes sleep more likely. When we are tired, we are feeling worn out/exhausted/fatigued — and that doesn’t make sleep more likely.
Sometimes when we make a change to our sleep schedule (or anything else, for that matter), the mind stays slightly more alert over the short-term to monitor for the effect of that change — and this can lead to some temporary sleep disruption.
As long as we can avoid perpetuating that temporary sleep disruption by abandoning all the techniques that help build sleep drive, strengthen the body clock, and lower arousal, sleep will soon get right back on track all by itself!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
At the moment, it sounds as though you are scheduling around seven hours for sleep. Unless you typically get close to seven hours of sleep, you might be inadvertently setting yourself up for nighttime wakefulness. So, cutting back on the amount of time you spend in bed/allot for sleep at night might be helpful.
When you wake during the night, do you stay in bed? Does being awake in bed ever start to feel unpleasant? If so, there’s another opportunity there to help improve sleep over the longer-term by getting out of bed! This can help lower sleep-related worry/anxiety by giving you a more appealing alternative to staying in bed, while also preventing you from reinforcing a negative association between your bed and unpleasant wakefulness.
It’s not too surprising that all the things you mentioned haven’t proven to be helpful or effective — and that’s because they don’t help build sleep drive, strengthen the body clock, or lower arousal!
I hope this helps!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Have you looked into cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I) techniques, Ed?
The beauty of these techniques is that they’re skills-based (so, once learned, they’re with you for life!) and they help address all the thoughts and behaviors that typically perpetuate sleep disruption.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Welcome to the forum — glad to hear you’ve discovered cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I) techniques and feel they are worth implementing! Can you tell us a bit more about the strategies you’re implementing and how long you’ve been implementing them for?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
