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Thanks for sharing. Things sure sound difficult for you right now. I wish you all the best.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Most people don’t have any real idea of when they wake and when they sleep — probably because when we are asleep we don’t know what time it is and we don’t know how long we are asleep for (because we’re asleep, right?)! If you are filling out a sleep diary, best guesses are usually the best way to fill them out, in order to move away from clock watching.
When that panic and fear shows up at night, how do you currently respond to it? On those difficult days after difficult nights, are you still doing things that matter to you — or do you find yourself completely withdrawing from life?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Sara! You know, I always find it hard to read at any time of the day — I sleep fine but for some reason always find myself drifting off after reading for a while!
Have you tried allowing yourself to remain in bed when you wake during the night, and to perhaps give yourself “permission” to be awake? If wakefulness continues to feel really unpleasant you might give yourself the opportunity to do something more pleasant instead (for example, you might read in bed if that’s something you enjoy, until conditions feel a bit better for sleep).
When you don’t accept social invitations in the evening, does that make things better?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Since anxiety tends to show up from time to time, for as long as we are human beings, perhaps taking actions to avoid anxiety might be getting you a bit tangled up in actions that might not be too helpful over the longer term (since anxiety always comes back, right?).
Perhaps you might shift your goal to something you have a bit more control over at night. So, instead of trying to make sleep happen or trying to fight or avoid difficult thoughts and feelings such as anxiety, you might give yourself permission to experience wakefulness (especially since wakefulness is part of sleep) and if that wakefulness starts to feel really unpleasant you might simply do something more pleasant instead — and that more pleasant activity might be something you do out of bed, or in bed.
I hope there’s something useful here!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Sometimes it can be useful to acknowledge the difficult thoughts and feelings that show up by naming them in some way, for example “Here is anxiety” or “I notice I am feeling anxious” and then to make a bit of space for them to exist. To practice observing them and allowing them to come and go as they please, without trying to fight or avoid them.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
All that being awake means is that you aren’t asleep — sometimes it becomes more difficult when we get tangled up in a struggle with it, trying to get rid of it or trying to figure out why it’s present.
I wonder if the “trying” was the cause of the struggle here? Trying to sleep, trying to get rid of anxiety?
Good on you for trying the AWAKE exercise — how did you find that? What was your goal when you tried it?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It can be frustrating and scary when any of this difficult stuff seems to come back, right? Hypnic jerks are similar to our thoughts and feelings in terms of the amount of control we have over them (and how they might respond to our efforts to fight or avoid them).
Perhaps it might be useful to practice the AWAKE exercise at night if you find yourself getting tangled up in a struggle with them and all the difficult thoughts and feelings that might come with them. And, perhaps during the day, it might be useful to practice the NOW exercise whenever you find your understandable concern about the hypnic jerks pulling your attention away from where you are and what you are doing.
If you haven’t seen it yet, you might find this YouTube video on hypnic jerks (and all the comments that go with it!) useful.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
If you were to change your sleep window, what would your goal be? If it’s connected to trying to control sleep, it might not be useful!
What are the more difficult nights stopping you from doing each day, that you are able to do when you have better nights? If nothing, perhaps there’s no need to be quite so focused on them?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Wonderful! Thank you so much for sharing, @Kriskin1! Unnecessary thoughts will probably still show up from time to time — that’ll be your brain looking out for you!
When you are able to reflect on any positive stuff that’s present even when things are difficult, you are helping to open yourself up a bit more to the world around you — and so perhaps some of the difficult stuff might be a bit more “diluted” when it shows up!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thank you for sharing and good on you for getting in some practice! Remember your goal isn’t to try to control your thoughts (we never have control over those) but to help you practice being a bit more present and better able to do things that matter when difficult or unhelpful thoughts show up and try to sweep you away or pull you away from doing things that matter!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I wonder if this might be a good example of how our desire not to experience wakefulness or other difficult thoughts and feelings can pull us away from living the life we want to live? If so, perhaps not traveling — if that’s something important to you — might not be a workable response?
If you agree, what might a more workable response be? How might you respond to the difficult thoughts and feelings that show up and how might you act in response to them?
Jet lag comes with international travel — there’s not a whole lot we can do about it (remember we can’t control sleep)! If you are following a sleep window I’d suggest simply continuing with it, keeping the start and end time the same but in local time. So, for example if your sleep window begins at 11:00 PM at home, you might start it at 11:00 PM local time when away.
More importantly, I wonder if shifting your focus onto the life enriching experience travel has to offer might be more important than any sleep window and, perhaps, even sleep itself?!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello @Jenna and thanks for your post! I wonder if part of the difficulty you mentioned might come from trying to “manage” anxiety? I wonder if allowing it to come and go as it pleases might help free you from the struggle?
@Milko: Good on you for doing something that matters, even though it didn’t feel pleasant! Quite often, difficult thoughts and feelings come along for the ride when we do things that matter. We can’t control that since they’re part of being a human being (it’s when we try that we’re more likely to get tangled up in a struggle).It sure sounds as though you are practicing a new approach and are starting to notice how that might be useful, Milko!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I don’t know of any way to make sleep happen — usually, the more we try to make sleep happen, the more we struggle and the more difficult sleep becomes.
If you have found that you cannot force yourself to sleep, perhaps a new approach might be useful? An approach that frees you from struggle and might help you experience wakefulness in a more workable way?
The AWAKE exercise might be helpful for that — is it something you’ve been practicing with?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hello Sal and thanks for the great questions!
What would be the benefit of checking the time when you wake? What would you be able to do with that information?
In terms of dealing with thoughts that arrive when you travel, what do you think would be a workable way to respond to those? Have you been able to successfully (and permanently) fight, avoid, or otherwise control what your mind does up to this point? If not, perhaps moving away from trying to fight or avoid certain thoughts or feelings might free you from some struggle? We’ll cover this in a lot more detail as the course progresses.
Finally, in terms of thanking your brain, what’s your goal with that? If your goal is to control your mind, it’s not going to “work” — I don’t know many people who can control their minds! It’s simply a quick way you can respond to your thoughts in a way that tells your brain that you’re listening and so you might then be able to engage in meaningful action rather than getting tangled up in a battle with your mind!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Thanks for sharing! It can be quite interesting to notice just how inaccurate many of our thoughts can be, right?
It doesn’t really matter how we practice detaching ourselves from our thoughts and recognizing them for what they are — we just want to ensure we don’t fall into the trap of trying to control what our mind chooses to do (because it’ll usually do whatever it wants to do anyway)!
So, if difficult thoughts disappear, it can be useful to recognize that they’ll almost certainly come back at some point (there’s no delete button for the brain!). Without that understanding, we might be more likely to get pulled back into a struggle with them when they reappear!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
