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Your experience doesn’t sound unusual. What feels like the best way to move forward, as you reflect on your experience?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
I’m happy to chime in here to share my observations. I don’t see any “best” way of moving away from medication or supplements. A really slow taper, a really fast taper, going cold turkey, or anything in between.
What seems to matter most is having a plan that feels realistic, and then sticking to it — regardless of what each night might bring.
As the expert on yourself, what do you feel a plan might look like for you?
(I’ll also add as a PS that melatonin doesn’t generate sleep — so all the sleep you’ve been getting while taking it is sleep that your body has generated all by itself.)
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You clearly have a growth mindset and you are a powerful problem solver!
It sounds like you enjoy lying with your daughter and reading until she falls sleep. When you notice difficult thoughts and feelings showing up, you practice the AWAKE exercise.
Having the intention to remain awake until 11:30 PM would be aligned with keeping a sleep window with an earliest possible “bedtime” (or “sleep opportunity time”). And it might be hard to stay awake until then in such a cozy, warm, and loving environment!
You are trying to maintain a consistent out of bed time in the morning to help anchor your body clock, ensure time for sleep drive to build during the day, and give you the opportunity to do things that matter and to live the kind of life you want to live.
What changes — if any — do you want to make, and why?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Definitely 👍
The intended outcome is similar (refocus over struggle) — the route there is just a little different. Which approach do you prefer?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
What might be going on here is that you made a change to your sleep window and then your brain was a bit more alert in response — it naturally wanted to monitor and evaluate the effect of that change.
That, in turn, can lead to a bit more alertness and some other thoughts and feelings. All natural and normal, and no barrier to sleep.
What matters now is how you respond when that happens. What have you been doing in response and what have you been learning from that?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
It’s so easy to get pulled back into a struggle or to feel trapped in a struggle — so you aren’t alone.
Ongoing struggle often comes from doing something that our experience tells us doesn’t work, yet we do it over and over again — perhaps because it feels logical or safer or more familiar than any alternative.
Your sleep system is clearly working as it should. You are noticing sleepiness showing up at night. When you go to bed, anxiety shows up as your problem-solving brain does its job of looking out for you. It’s trying to protect you and prepare you for the battle it predicts is about to show up (based upon experience).
You shared that you are trying to move away from struggle and you are practicing the AWAKE exercise. As you pointed out, that’s hard to do (especially at first since it’s a new skill) — and is it any easier to battle and struggle instead?
What have you been learning from your practice with the AWAKE exercise, @Ryno84?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Good job sticking to your sleep window for most of Week 1!
It sounds like you felt bad for grabbing an extra gummy because you wanted to practice responding to wakefulness (and all the thoughts and feelings that showed up with it) in a different way.
In other words, that feeling revealed important information — and on opportunity to do something different (if you so choose) in the future!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Wonderful — you are consciously looking for the good stuff and that makes it easier to find and easier to notice in the future.
You are developing a skill that can help make difficult periods a little bit lighter — a skill that can help remind you that good stuff can be present even when things are hard and that you can influence what those “good things” might be, through your choice of actions!
Thanks for sharing! 👍
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
A dozing state of body sounds like a sleeping state of body — it’s just that sleep isn’t happening as you want it to. And so you then find yourself getting stressed and problem-solving and trying to figure out how to fix the problem (which is normal human behavior!).
You are waking during the night because waking is a normal part of sleep. And, what happens next is all down to the level of threat your brain associates with being awake (does it believe that it needs to fire up to protect you and prepare you for battle and struggle?) and how you respond when things aren’t happening as you might want them to (effort, problem-solving, etc).
Ultimately, sleep is a passive process. It requires “less” not “more”. The AWAKE exercise isn’t required just because you notice you’re awake. It can be a helpful tool to practice if you notice yourself struggling or responding to whatever is happening in a way that’s creating more struggle, though.
Is there anything useful here?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You know that if you only give sleep the opportunity to show up in bed, that’s where it will show up — because you cannot remain awake forever!
It’s great that you’re viewing these types of actions as experiments — because that’s exactly what they are! There’s no such thing as failure, only learning opportunities!
You are learning, you are taking action, and you are noticing change happen.
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
That’s a great question — what have you tried up to now, and what have you learned from doing those things?
Dealing with distracting thoughts and feelings during the day in a workable way is explored in more detail as the course progresses.
In the meantime, have you tried playing around with the concept shared in Week 1 of simply thanking your brain in response to whatever it says or whatever feelings it chooses to generate?
That’s certainly a lot quicker (and more realistic) compared to trying to work through the AWAKE exercise when you’re in a meeting or engaged in some other daytime activity!
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Sorry for missing your post, Chloe. Having a two-year-old wake you up (and even waiting for that moment) can make things more difficult.
If and when he wake and cries for you is out of your control. What you can control are your actions. With that in mind — and as the expert on yourself — what do you feel is a workable way to respond when you notice that you’re putting pressure on yourself to sleep or notice that vigilance grow?
The AWAKE exercise could be an option if you find yourself getting drawn into a struggle at this point. Is that something you’ve played around with? If so, what have you learned from that?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
You are taking action, putting into practice what we’ve been covering at this early stage of the course.
You are implementing a sleep window to move away from chasing after sleep. You are maintaining a consistent out of bed time in the morning to anchor your body clock and ensure you have the opportunity to do things that matter (rather than spending even more time in bed). You are reading or watching TV when sleep doesn’t show up.
And, in the midst of the difficult situation you described, you are still flying from California to Japan. Living life and doing what matters, even though that’s hard to do.
As for suggestions on how to get sleepy — your experience seems to tell you that’s out of your control. The more you try, the less likely it seems to be to show up. So, as the expert on yourself, what’s do you feel is the most workable way to deal with that?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
As you pointed out, that might make things more difficult @Alan-John. As the expert on yourself and your own experience, what ideas do you have to deal with that swing of two hours on those two or three nights each week?
@Karima87 — Being afraid of going to bed later is totally understandable, and I wouldn’t usually suggest a sleep window of much under six hours or so. In what ways is going to bed earlier helping you move closer to where you want to be?—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Being in the hospital is going to make sleep more difficult. Do you have any idea how long you’ll be there for?
It might be difficult to implement an appropriate sleep window while in hospital. Instead, you might want to consider going to bed (or giving sleep the opportunity to show up) only when you feel sleepy enough for sleep (finding it hard to stay awake) and seeing if you might be able to maintain a reasonably consistent final out of bed time/getting the day started time in the morning.
A sleep window is a very small part of the overall picture when it comes to moving away from the insomnia struggle, so I’d encourage you not to put too much effort into trying to make that perfect — especially in a hospital environment!
As for feeling anxious about wakefulness — that might be coming from your brain trying to protect you from what it believes to be the threat of being awake at night. As for why it thinks being awake is a threat? That might have been learned (through no fault of your own!) from the repeated and ongoing struggle that comes from trying to resist wakefulness at night.
That’s just one idea, though. And you are the expert on you. What are your thoughts on that?
—If you are ready to stop struggling with insomnia you can enroll in the online insomnia coaching course right now! If you would prefer ongoing phone or video coaching calls as part of a powerful three month program that will help you reclaim your life from insomnia, consider applying for the Insomnia Mastery program.
The content of this post is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
